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| Image by johnnyberg. Edits by me. |
Roll up, roll up, we got the best o’ the worst in ‘ere! Roll up!
Yes, you sir, and you madam, come this way ‘n see the weirdest ‘n wonderfullest o’ God’s creations. We got the Bearded Lady, the most beautiful woman in Christendom, with a beard fit for the Lord ‘imself! Step right up, see ‘er for yourself. Step closer, she don’t bite. That’s right, a little bit closer, ain’t she beautiful?
Now, you madam, how’s about you come this way? We got the Dog-Faced Boy down ‘ere. Ain’t he cute? Don’t pet ‘im or he will bite! Don’t see if he don’t! We found ‘im in darkest Peru, and gave ‘im an ‘ome. I’m all heart, really, though I don’t like to brag. Why don’t you stop and give ‘im a treat?
Ah, the esteemed gentleman in the top ‘at. You want to see the Siamese Sisters, don’t you? Joined at the ‘ip, they are. Right pair of troublemakers. But aren’t they sweet? That’s Cecila and Emmeline, left to right. Aw, I knew you’d like ’em. That’s right, go ahead, go on in. They’ll give you a right royal welcome, oh yes they will.
And you, my dear. Bet you’re wonderin’ what we got down ‘ere at the end, ain’t yer? We got somethin’ very special indeed lined up for you. Go on, ‘ead on down there, I’m right behind yer. Does that birthmark o’ yours hurt at all? I ain’t seen one like that in years. Covers ‘alf yer face, it does. Pity, you’re such a pretty young thing. Oh, yer used to people starin’? Well that’s ‘andy to know. Yeah, this ‘ere is our last cage. Yeah, it’s empty.
It’s for you.
One more for the collection! I wonder what he’ll name her. I’m imagining a British carnival barker for the first time in my life. 😉
I could really picture the narrator because of the distinctive voice. Subtly menacing as he describe the other “attractions”.
Remind me never to go to a side show.
I hate freak shows. Poetic justice, if you ask me!
Icy, you nailed that accent and made it easy to read. Fun, terrifying, story!
Super fun, delicious read.
Love a good carnival barker!
This really did make me think of the living hell poor Joseph Merrick (John Merrick) must have lived.
Poor girl! Loved the dialogue!
Great energy, great fun. I felt bad for all the “exhibits,” wondering how they ended up there. All too soon found out. Poor girl. Nicely done in few words, Icy.
Great narrative — and, from what I understand, historically accurate.
Great voice in this. Nice work.
Great dialogue Icy and another fantastic read.